Friday, September 18, 2009

Mind Your Manners - and General Peeves

Okay - so I'm going to go ahead and say that I might just offend some of my readers. Hopefully not, but with all of this stuff being said about having general courtesy and manners in light of the Kanye and "You lie!" incidents, I feel I have a couple of things to add.

In regards to general behavior and decorum, when did it become okay to celebrate your birthday for longer than the actual day? I would say about 50% of my friends take birthdays to the extreme. January is not just a month anymore - it's "Karen's Birthday Month". Telling people it is your birthday and announcing your plans and how special you are was once frowned upon. Doesn't anyone else remember their mother whispering in their ear that this is obnoxious? Sure, the casual email - it's my birthday - let's eat, drink or whatever is completely fine. It's the full blown multiple day celebrations that I find ridiculous. And these aren't milestone birthdays either. They range from say 27 to 43. Here's the deal with birthdays, everyone has one, and it's a birthDAY not a birthMONTH. Obviously there are exceptions for people who have something a little more to celebrate on a birthday (surviving cancer is one), but generally, could we all just tone this down a little?

This brings me to the general shift in the way people talk about and perceive themselves. It use to be that people who said things like "I'm awesome" were conceited jerks. What happended to that? Self-confidence is one thing, complete self-adoration another entirely! If you're truly awesome, the world will let you know.
The Facebook Status is the best way to measure this about yourself. I update my status often (mostly to market shows I'm in or producing, but also to share the occasional injury or odd circumstance). However it can get ugly in a hurry. Read it out loud and measure how high it is on the brag scale. If it makes you giggle, please post, if it makes you cringe even a little, it's back to the drawing board.

And whatever happened to thank you notes and real "in the mail" invitations??? I host a holiday party every year and spend HOURS handwriting and addressing the invitations. It's kind of replaced our Christmas cards and isn't it so nice to get something in the mail? I'm not too opposed to the emailed thank's still the gesture that counts the most, but saying nothing is really, really, bad behavior people. E-vites are cute to replace the at work email blast to grab a drink, but for a real, bonified event? No way.

Eating on the run has impacted table manners. I was recently at a wedding and one of the people at our table had not received her entree yet. Everyone except for say 3 of us at the table started - now this wasn't going to be a "it will get cold go ahead and eat" situation, her meal was on the way. And anyway, it's polite to wait, or at least wait until the person who has not yet been served says, "Please, go ahead and start." Not only that, they looked at us waiting like we were crazy.

Things just seem to be getting out of hand. Let's all try to just be nicer and quieter. Softer, and less braggy. Maybe it will spread like an uncovered sneeze. Which, don't even get me started on the disgusting things I've seen people do on the train...

1 comment:

  1. I so agree with what you said. And am patting myself on the back for insisting on good manners from you and Monica. (Is that bragging?) I know you didn't always want to spend Christmas and birthday afternoon writing thank yous, but they do mean so much. Another thing that is bad manners is bragging about money. My mother taught me that it was very bad manners to talk about how much money you had, and that the very wealthy never brag. Only the new rich who don't have any class. Over the years I have found that to be true.